Kelsey...oh, be still my heart

Have you been to the Reece's Rainbow site lately? Oh, be still my heart. So many babies, BABIES have been added recently. Kelsey is just one of them. I first saw her a few weeks ago, she comes to my mind and heart daily. Maybe it's the sprout of ginger colored hair I see under her bonnet. Maybe it's the fact that she is just a baby. My heart is pulled by her. I pray her family comes. She is just 3 to 4 months old right now. She is the absolute PERFECT age for adopting. She's in a country that moves swiftly. She could literally be home in time for her 1st birthday and first Christmas. She would fit right in for Early Intervention and never have a memory of the place she resides in now.

This is her blurb of information on the Reece's site: 

"Girl, born October 2011. Kelsey is a sweet baby girl with Down syndrome. 

 She does have a heart condition but her medical records indicate she should not need surgery.  Kelsey knows her caregivers, smiles at them and plays with toys. 

Married couples only, older parent and large families welcome, travel required."

You can click on either picture of Kelsey and 

donate to her fund on the Reece's Rainbow website. 

Your donations are 100% tax deductible. 

I cannot lie, I would love to have Kelsey here. Frankly, in my limited, human mind, I don't see how that can possibly happen. Right now, I am championing for her to find her family, whether that be our family or another, I just want her home! Forever, with her mommy and daddy. Are you her family? Are you willing to share this post with those you know? Will you join me in praying her home? 

love, 

 "I will go before you and will level the mountains; I will break down gates of bronze and cut through bars of iron. I will give you hidden treasures, riches stored in secret places, so that you may know that I am the LORD, the God of Israel, who summons you by name." Isaiah 45:2-3 (NIV)

Run down...

This past Wednesday, the 25th, I pulled a major muscle in my back. So bad, in fact, I could not even move my head to the right within a few hours of the incident. Well, that immediately meant no BootCamp for Thursday and possibly today too.

Thursday morning, I woke up stiff and SICK with only a squeak of a voice. Friday, I woke up utterly exhausted, I had a major "attack" during my sleep and could not breathe ***scared Shawn even*** I went ahead and took the kids to school and then went to Express+Care to get this stuff under control. I had also went to Express+Care on the 4th of January (just 23 days ago) before Jadon had surgery.

Well, apparently, I never 'got over' the borderline pneumonia/definite bronchitis I had on the 4th. I am utterly exhausted. I have not been this exhausted since the time I had mono in '99 and lost 60 lbs in 3 months. The PA I saw today said, "I see you've lost 6.5 lbs since January 4th. You feeling and eating ok?" To which I replied, "I dont' feel 'ok' but I have been dieting since the first of the year and working out regularly (as my body will allow) since January 16th."

I thought that would be a good thing, right? Well...not so much. He told me I am too run down, my lungs too taxed right now for the working out, especially when I admitted I was trying to attend a BootCamp, and then he said, "Two weeks. No working out, even lightly, for two weeks. You must rest. Period. If you don't, the next time you are in here in two weeks, you will be in the hospital."

Really? Well, good kind man, that was uncalled for :)

I am now on a medrol dose pack (steroids), zithromax (again), tessalon pearls (for my wicked cough) and then I start advair once I am done with the medrol dose pack. Nice, eh? Oh, and I am not to talk unless I have too...my kids and husband are going to LOVE that restriction. I have no voice today. None, it comes in patches, but generally, none.

I bowed out of BootCamp today, I called and left Missy a message, I hope she could understand me through my whispers and squeaks...BUT, come March, when I am good and healed and Jadon should be done with his next surgery by then, I am hitting up Missy's Fitness again for her Zumba. I am sticking to this high protein diet too, my belly fat has dropped IMMENSELY already. I cannot believe it. And not eating gluten, my bloat is nearly gone too.

B12 and Vitamin C, anyone?

Love,

"I will go before you and will level the mountains; I will break down gates of bronze and cut through bars of iron. I will give you hidden treasures, riches stored in secret places, so that you may know that I am the LORD, the God of Israel, who summons you by name." Isaiah 45:2-3 (NIV)

Salt and Light

Do you ever wonder if your testimony makes a difference? Do you have just enough salt to enhance something, just enough light to shine through?

I was blessed with a wonderful acknowledgement yesterday. Let me give you a little back-story to set the stage.

February of last year, Shawn and I committed to adoption; more specifically, we committed to Alexander. His pictures have not been on my blog since June of last year...but, I am going to put one back up here for this post.

When our dossier arrived in country, Alexander was not available because his mother had never signed the papers to terminate her parent rights (he was, as we were told, in the 'works' to be available in 2-3 months or so). We did not wish to wait even longer (we were 6 months into our adoption journey already), we were ready to complete our adoption journey and be home with our child. I had been trying for months to get the low down on Alexander to no avail. We moved forward, heavy hearted, but ready to met the child we felt called to, Andriy Igorovich Tverdokhlib--our Jadon. In a sense, we lost the one boy we never truly "had" to lose and that was Alexander. I pray for Alexander regularly. I pray for his family. This past week or so has been very hard on this momma's heart. He weighs so heavy on me still. I know his family HAS to be out there. THEY MUST BE! So much work has been done through this child it is amazing. Surely, God does not intend for him to be an orphan forever. 

Now, I want to talk to you about Lora and Dean. The Lyon family. I met Lora while going through our own adoption pangs. Everyone knew our story, eventually. She knows what happened. She and Dean were waiting to adopt Tanner.

A young boy, born with polycystic kidney disease and could have been adopted prior to June of this year but Ukraine had 'changed the rules' during their adoption stating only children on their approved special needs list could be adopted before age 5. Tanner also was not 5. They began the wait to see if Ukraine would add his diagnosis to the list. We were all encouraged the new list would be announced in October. It wasn't. The Lyons' chose to wait it out, committed to Tanner. Sadly, in December, their choice to wait it out was taken from them when Tanner was moved from his orphanage to the the orphanage Father Mikhail runs in another region of the county. 

So, can you see the parallels in our story? Our boy, not available. Their boy not available. Both situations, truly, out of our control. 

Here's where it gets good. My nettie bff, Julie was in Ukraine adopting Peter and she had the chance to see this gorgeous girl, frequently, and was able to photograph her. She shared those photos with the "waiters" group of gals waiting for their travel dates. Well, Lora saw this child's pictures and she and Dean COMMITTED to HER! They are in country now and working to finalize their adoption of Francine from Reece's Rainbow.

Wanna know what is really cool? Day before yesterday, Lora caught me online on FB and sent me this message.

Lora:  Christie!!!!!! I have to thank you

Me: what did I do 

Lora: Well, it is just watching you go through what you did with your boys and ending up with Jadon is what has given me the ability to move on after Tanner and now I'm sitting here and I am SO GRATEFUL for your example!

Lora admitted it would have been so easy to quit and be sad...

but, today, Lora and I talked again yesterday after she told me they had 

THE BEST DAY EVER! **they met their girl**

I replied: I am so proud of you for staying the course.

Lora: thank you I couldn't have done it without mama's like you showing the way!

Me: sure you could...I am just happy to know that God worked through my story for at least ONE person. That's good enough for me.

How do you like that? I had just enough salt and a spark of light to help one person! I love it!! I am so happy for Lora and Dean. Two people I've never met in real life but I am just GIDDY for them!!! And, thanks to God, I have a spot in her story and I think that is awesome. 

Love, 

"I will go before you and will level the mountains; I will break down gates of bronze and cut through bars of iron. I will give you hidden treasures, riches stored in secret places, so that you may know that I am the LORD, the God of Israel, who summons you by name." Isaiah 45:2-3 (NIV)

5th work out

Well, I made my 5th workout today and my out of shape body PROTESTED! I was fine all last week, but, today? Well, today, my back seized up on the left side. I've got one heckuva spasm going right now. Joy.

Those who know me well, know my back is wack. Part of it is my weight, the majority of it is my *ahem* top heaviness, and the rest is due to back injuries sustained while pregnant with Jared. When Jared was just shy of 2 years old I had my first back surgery. Thank heavens it was successful. However, during that time, I also learned that I have one completely necrotic disk and one that bulges all the time and is "waiting to blow".

My L5 is completely necrotic, dried up, dead, arthritic and generally no good. L4 was able to be repaired during the surgery. L3 bulges and has yet to blow (that I know of). The surgery Dr. Kowlowitz performed was successful and I had virtually NO back trouble for 3 years, that is, until I carried the twins. They wrecked me again. I've been in for shots, even though my body does not respond to cortisone and we know it; insurance still demands that course of treatment before anything more invasive can be done. Well, shots did not work, therapy did not work, and next step is surgery. Fusion. Not good. I cannot be down that long. I have a house and children to care for. No, a fusion is not in the works for me. Not now, not ever, I pray.

So, today, while working out, my overweight out of shape body said, "NO!" And now? Well, now, I say THANK GOODNESS I have BioFreeze *or Perform as it may be called now* and Magnesium Glycinate to help with the muscle pain and spasms.

I take Magnesium Glycinate for my neck spasms (which have been well controlled since we were in the Ukraine---that is 3 months now!) and the joint/muscle pain from the Psoriatic Arthritis too.  I take mega doses of Vitamin D for my back pain too.

So, tomorrow is my second weigh-in. I am actually, weirdly, excited to get on the scale.

LOL 

**never, ever thought I would say such a thing**

Love, 

 "I will go before you and will level the mountains; I will break down gates of bronze and cut through bars of iron. I will give you hidden treasures, riches stored in secret places, so that you may know that I am the LORD, the God of Israel, who summons you by name." Isaiah 45:2-3 (NIV)

Jadon and his breathing

I am happy to say ALL issues with Jadon's "breathing" have been resolved. Turns out he doesn't need o2 at all. Hmmm, really? How on Earth do we know that?

Well, after fighting all weekend after we came home, suctioning him and still giving Albuterol treatments with NO change whatsoever, we wen't to our Nurse Practitioner (NP) on Monday the 16th. Shawn was home, so I was able to just take Jadon in and leave the kids at home with daddy since it was MLK day.

Our NP checked him over, listened to him cough/gag, and then checked his throat. Let's just say she was ASTOUNDED by the amount of thick, heavy, phlegm jumping around in his throat. She ordered us to give him Mucinex at least twice per day, up to 4 times a day, and dose him at 1/2 tsp. each time. Also, we added Zyrtec at night to the tune of 1 tsp. per dose. IMMEDIATELY there was a difference. Jadon slept through the night for the first time since we'd had surgery 10 days prior.

No snoring, no snotting. Just SLEEP.

The next day he was great too. Well, during our visit to the NP I also discussed the fact that we weren't given a pulse ox for him to wear at night and how I thought that was rather stupid since the pulmo doc demanded he needed o2 at night until we see them again in February. BUT, now here's the kicker, Jadon was well known in the hospital for tossing alarms because he would not leave his nasal canula in place. Now, if your child is known for pulling out/off his canula in his sleep, wouldn't you ask for a monitor (pulse ox) so you would KNOW when he was without the o2 the doctors so adamantly proclaimed he needed? Don't you think they would comply? Nope, they didnt'; but our NP did. And lo and behold the first nigh we had the pulse ox (2 days after starting the mucinex/zyrtec medication routine) we had the pulse ox in our house.

Well, we hooked him up at bedtime and settled in for the night. Guess what? NO ALARMS. What? Did you read that correctly? NO ALARMS. So Shawn and I decided to leave him in our room again and place the pulse ox on him during nap and bedtimes again. He showed us again what his needs were. He needed simply to sleep. No alarms again on the second day. So, one more day, just for good measure. Yep! You guessed it. NO ALARMS.

Now, Jadon is back to sleeping with his brothers in their room. He is taking his medicine so well! And is now finally able to eat food again. See, when that phlegm was so thick he could not even eat spaghetti or macaroni or applesauce or pudding. Those foods were so light in weight they just rested on top of the phlegm ball in his throat. What was Jadon eating? Well, my poor boy was eating oatmeal, 4 times a day. Oatmeal, stick to your spoon thick oatmeal. Since starting the meds he's eaten baked tilapia, baked sweet potatoes, tuna noodle casserole, spaghetti, salad, applesauce, fruits, puddings too. You name it, my boy is back to eating it!!


This past week I was also able to go to Missy's Fitness and workout for 35 minutes 4 days in a row last week. It felt GOOD! I did not make Friday after spending a good portion of the night in the ER with Jadon for another issue entirely. No worries now, he is fine, but surgery is in his future for sure. And that freaks me out a bit. I am worried we will have these same issues again with his breathing. Not looking forward to that at all.

Here's a picture from our ER trip

Love,

"I will go before you and will level the mountains; I will break down gates of bronze and cut through bars of iron. I will give you hidden treasures, riches stored in secret places, so that you may know that I am the LORD, the God of Israel, who summons you by name." Isaiah 45:2-3 (NIV)

Christian recording artist, Aaron Shust

Aaron Shust and his wife, were just blessed with a baby boy born with Trisomy 21.

If you enjoy his music and message, stop by their blog at SHUSTLOG and share some encouraging comments right now.

Michael Aaron Shust is beautiful! Such a handsome little man.

Love,


"I will go before you and will level the mountains; I will break down gates of bronze and cut through bars of iron. I will give you hidden treasures, riches stored in secret places, so that you may know that I am the LORD, the God of Israel, who summons you by name." Isaiah 45:2-3 (NIV)

Destination.........HOME!

We are HOME!!! We arrived home at 7:52 p.m. Grandma promptly fed Jadon his supper that was made while the Apria guy (for our oxygen) filled me in on what's what and how to make it all work.

We then put the boys to bed, Jackson is sick with a very sore throat. Soooo, I guess he is going to the doctor tomorrow. Joseph was happy to see us, but sad to see Grandma and Grandpa leaving. I have the best mother-in-law. She scrubbed my bathrooms and my kitchen, cared for my kids and ran the vacuum.

Jadon has had his first round of treatments here at home. Shawn is terrified he's not going to have the oxygen he needs because he constantly knocks the canula out of place. Well, I asked for a pulse oximeter and could not get the doctors to get us one no matter how much I voiced my concern that I have no way of knowing he doesn't have enough O2 except by checking him visually, frequently. So, praying he leaves this one alone, I did trim it a bit to fit him better. I hope it helps.

I am to do a breathing treatment and CPT every 4 hours. This combo of treatment takes 30 minutes here at home (took just 12 in the hospital). So, there will be no time for rest for mommy for a good while. I have just 2 hours before Jadon needs his next treatment to keep us on the schedule that will best fit our needs.

So wish us well, pray me strong.

And thank you, THANK YOU for all the well wishes, good vibes, healing thoughts and prayers!

Peace out!

Love,


"I will go before you and will level the mountains; I will break down gates of bronze and cut through bars of iron. I will give you hidden treasures, riches stored in secret places, so that you may know that I am the LORD, the God of Israel, who summons you by name." Isaiah 45:2-3 (NIV)

Another day...

We are still here, with little to no change. Jadon still requires the same amount of oxygen. We are on prilosec, orapred, albuterol followed by CPT (every 3 hours I might add), amoxicillin, ibuprofen every 6 hours rotated with tylenol every 6 hours. So ibuprofen at 9, tyelnol at 12, ibuprofen at 3...you get the idea, add in another dose of Miralax today and another suppository that produced a movement 4 hours later. Jadon has not had Lortab elixir at all today. He's slept comfortably, ate well and is drinking ok.

See what tomorrow brings I guess. Keep praying, Dr. Sufi says we cannot go home til he is OFF the oxygen.


"I will go before you and will level the mountains; I will break down gates of bronze and cut through bars of iron. I will give you hidden treasures, riches stored in secret places, so that you may know that I am the LORD, the God of Israel, who summons you by name." Isaiah 45:2-3 (NIV)

Sooooooooo close

We were sooooooooooo close to going home. The Resident said, "Yes." The pulmonologist's nurse practitioner said, "Yes." So why aren't we home? Well, because, then...then, the pulmonologist did come in and he said, "NO." His word stands and here we sit.

We are now doing CPT every three hours, breathing treatments every three hours, did chest xrays and here we sit.

Jadon still cannot breathe room air, I still do not have the results of the chest xrays, he still cannot be without 1 liter of oxygen while sleeping.

His tummy was very hard and distended today. We administered Miralax and a suppository. We did have success! And my boy has been fluffing the air with gas strong enough to ignite a bonfire. He has also dropped some black slugs out of his nose (ewwwww). So while my son is GROSS, he sure is cute!!!

VERDICT IS IN!!!!!!!!! 

Jadon has pneumonia (let the booing and hissing begin)

*which means he truly is his mother's son, I too was teetering between 

walking pneumonia and bronchitis earlier this week and had NO idea I was that sick*

"I will go before you and will level the mountains; I will break down gates of bronze and cut through bars of iron. I will give you hidden treasures, riches stored in secret places, so that you may know that I am the LORD, the God of Israel, who summons you by name." Isaiah 45:2-3 (NIV)

Wow, Merry Christmas to Jadon

Today is Christmas day in Ukraine...I had hoped to celebrate some Ukrainian traditions this year. That did not happen...we are still in the hospital, of course.

We have left the PICU, we arrived in room 4008 at about 3:30 this afternoon and Jadon stayed awake the entire time until bed time at 6:15 following a dose of lortab, which came after a nice hearty dinner of mashed potatoes and mashed bananas. When we arrived up here today, he ate pudding, applesauce, jello and drank some more gatorade.

The boy will eat, no matter what, he will eat. I know he's experiencing pain and discomfort by the struggle to swallow and wincing..he will not cry. I hate this. He only cries when we give him the Lortab (it tastes AWFUL).

He is on .5 ltrs of oxygen right now. However, this is only sufficient when awake. As soon as he falls asleep, he desats into the 80's. No bueno. Now, IF I can keep him on his tummy, he does not desat even while sleeping; but, soon as he rolls, even just to his side, he desats. So, I am calling it now, we will be going home with oxygen tomorrow.

I've got coursework to do. Nite, thank you all for the prayers. They mean the world to me and my family.

Love,

"I will go before you and will level the mountains; I will break down gates of bronze and cut through bars of iron. I will give you hidden treasures, riches stored in secret places, so that you may know that I am the LORD, the God of Israel, who summons you by name." Isaiah 45:2-3 (NIV)

Oh what a night....

Early January back in 2012...

Ok so that is NOT how the song goes, but it's all I've got. January 6th, 2012, Jadon went in for surgery that took a half hour to complete. Tonsilectomy, adenoidectomy, and cleaning of his ears (impacted with sebum).

Well, my baby took over an hour in recovery. Two breathing treatments later (one Albuterol and one Racemic given via nebulizer) they let me come back to be with him. I administered a 2nd Racemic to him myself. We then left for the PICU floor. Jadon's saturation levels plummeted to just 79 in a matter of 4 minutes.

My baby was gray, his lips were blue, his hands and feet purple and he could not make a sound. At all. They bagged him right in front of me and began manual manipulation of breaths for him. They did so for about 2 minutes. They then put oxygen on him.

Since then we have had several times of bradycardia (low heart rate), fevers, a few episodes of apnea with respirations in the low teens, and general unhappiness. Poor peanut.

My baby has had a rough day. Yet, he cries little. He has welcomed my touch, preferring only to be held by me in the beginning of all of this. He is resting well. We are on a pain management regiment of Lortab elixir (ewwww) and ibuprofen (yes!) and decadron still. He ate a container of applesauce, signing "more" when it was finished and signing "eat" before I gave it to him. He also drank 4 ounces of lemon-lime Gatorade too with his thickener.

We are trying to see what mixture of oxygen baby boy needs and wean him off. However, he was given Lortab just 30 minutes ago and he cannot maintain his oxygen levels with oxygen in his sleep...crud.

Here are some pictures from today...some scary some sweet.

Nite, nite...

 "I will go before you and will level the mountains; I will break down gates of bronze and cut through bars of iron. I will give you hidden treasures, riches stored in secret places, so that you may know that I am the LORD, the God of Israel, who summons you by name." Isaiah 45:2-3 (NIV)

AN ORPHAN NO MORE!!!!!!!!!

THIS JUST IN!!!!!!!

It was GOTCHA DAY TODAY IN ODESSA, UKRAINE!!!!!!

Peter Julian Kehm is with his mommy and daddy!!!!!

Need I say more? Oh, ya, it's Christmas in Ukraine!!!

"I will go before you and will level the mountains; I will break down gates of bronze and cut through bars of iron. I will give you hidden treasures, riches stored in secret places, so that you may know that I am the LORD, the God of Israel, who summons you by name." Isaiah 45:2-3 (NIV)

Days 2 and 3 of Bootcamp

Well days 2 and 3 of Missy's Fitness Bootcamp did not and will not happen :( boo.

I went to the doctor Wednesday early evening, and according to the PA working, I am "teetering between walking pneumonia and bronchitis"...uhh, say what? I told him I don't sound that bad. His reply? "You do when I listen to you."

Fever hit at 3 this morning along with a hacking session that I am certain resulted in me losing half a lung.

Tomorrow (a.k.a day 3) will not happen because of Jadon's surgery. I have to leave here at 3:30 a.m. to have him down to St. V's by 5 a.m. for surgery to commence at 7--we must be the first ones of the day. I am grateful my lungs started feeling so tight when they did and I went to the doctor, I would hate to have exposed an entire pediatric floor to this wretched junk.

Jared is minimally better, my lungs are less tight, but I am tired! I am actually looking forward to resting in the hospital! Wow, never thought I would say that!

So, if you're the praying type, keep little man in your prayers.

We will be undergoing a tonsillectomy, adenoidectomy, ear cleaning, and possible myringotomy (tube placement) as well. We are shooting for the trifecta. Praying we come home on Sunday. Jadon's never been "under" before so we are walking unknown territory with him. Good news is his neck is stable, intubation should be no problem...my only worry at this point is the croup he is still fighting.

much love to you all...


"I will go before you and will level the mountains; I will break down gates of bronze and cut through bars of iron. I will give you hidden treasures, riches stored in secret places, so that you may know that I am the LORD, the God of Israel, who summons you by name." Isaiah 45:2-3 (NIV)

Crud...

My house has been hit with the funk...

My oldest came home yesterday sounding like he'd been smoking a pack of smokes a day for the duration of his 9 years and complaining of a headache. Took him to the doctor this morning, he has bronchitis and a gnarly sinus infection.

My youngest woke up barking...ahhh, that familiar sound of a seal. You know, the seals in Indiana? OH, you don't? Well, that would be croup, I know it all too well.

Joseph did not want to get out of bed this morning---guess who's next in line?

Momma DID get up at 0400 this morning to get myself ready for Missy BootCamp. Well, I made it, on time (14 minute drive), filled out the necessary paperwork, listened to Missy give the lowdown on the classes, foods, and field trips too.

Then, well, then it was right at 0600, I have to leave each day at 0610 in order to get home on time for Shawn to leave for work. So, I got in a 5 minute warm up once we got going, and, then I had to leave. I had also gotten two phone calls during that time, from Shawn, because he could not get Jadon calmed down and he was barking pretty bad with each gasp for air. Not good.

Well, my day has worn on, I am worn down, my throat hurts more. My ears pop each time I swallow and my lungs are getting tight. So, looks I am servin' up my own side of bronchitis now too. NOT GOOD. I am going to the doctor when Shawn gets home this afternoon. I must get some meds in me, I have BootCamp tomorrow and Jadon's surgery on Friday.

Soooooo, pray me well, k? 'Cause tomorrow is a new day...if you are in the area, click on the blog button for Missy's Fitness at the top of my sidebar to the right and check it out--I'm grateful I did. I am also adding "Made to Crave" to my mix too and APPLYING it to my life and food struggle. I am hitting this issue with food from all angles...I need God to get me through it.



Love,

"I will go before you and will level the mountains; I will break down gates of bronze and cut through bars of iron. I will give you hidden treasures, riches stored in secret places, so that you may know that I am the LORD, the God of Israel, who summons you by name." Isaiah 45:2-3 (NIV)

Accountability 101

Ok, blogger land...here you go.

I weigh 218 lbs.

I am overweight.

I am unhealthy.

I am ready to change.

I am starting Missy's Fitness Bootcamp for 6 weeks come 1/4/11.

Join me in my journey, pray for me (I'm gonna need it). 

Camp starts at 0530 Monday thru Friday.

This is my accountability. 

I will be sharing these next 6 weeks journey here too.

love,

"I will go before you and will level the mountains; I will break down gates of bronze and cut through bars of iron. I will give you hidden treasures, riches stored in secret places, so that you may know that I am the LORD, the God of Israel, who summons you by name." Isaiah 45:2-3 (NIV)