Recently, there was a child named Teri Lynn that the Reece's Rainbow community rallied for and raised a FULL GRANT for in just about 2 weeks. Well, just yesterday, one sweet woman who pushed very hard for Teri Lynn had to post a blogpost that both was wonderful and heartbreaking all at the same time.
That woman is Adeye, you can see her blogpost here
Now, here comes my questions.
1. If you donated to a fund, a push if you will, like this one with urgency for a child in an institution; would you be upset to learn the child was not available for any number of reasons?
2. How would you feel if your money was raised by an already committed family and in the long run they chose a child who was "not in urgent risk of transfer to the institution"?
3. How would you feel, as a donor, if the family had known the "story" for a while but could not fully disclose information?
4. Would you be pleased to know you helped rescue a child, period, since the family was committed to adopting?
In the grand scheme of things, it seems that rescuing children is the main objective here. I know if I had donated to Teri Lynn's fund, I would not care where that money went and if there had been a family able to commit to her but, ultimately not adopt her for any number of reasons, I would not mind what that family did with that money so long as they followed God's lead and continued to adopt--even if it were a newborn they brought home.
Following God's call is often blinding at times, that is why it is called faith; and falling in love with the picture of child can be heartbreaking if that child becomes unavailable--but God has the chance to make something very beautiful out of such situations. Children can still be rescued and forever families finally united whether the child is 7 years old or 7 months old.
So what do you say?
~Christie~ "I will go before you and will level the mountains; I will break down gates of bronze and cut through bars of iron. I will give you hidden treasures, riches stored in secret places, so that you may know that I am the LORD, the God of Israel, who summons you by name." Isaiah 45:2-3 (NIV)
10 comments:
1. A donation is a donation and I would not care which child eventually benefitted from it. It might affect my willingness to make future contributions. Just sayin'.
2. If I contributed to a specific family, it would be to support them whichever child they would eventually choose. No one can guarantee which child they will actually come home with until they travel anyway.
3. There are many reasons for withholding information while adopting. People need to understand that. Sometimes situations are fluid and the family doesn't even really know what's going on. You can't possibly be expected to share everything when you are in the middle of it.
4. Yes. Period.
I think that ultimately the goal is to save a child. "Imminent transfer" or "Already transferred" is the reality (sadly) for most of these kids whether it be now or later. I think regardless of when or how money was raised, if finding out the child is unavailable or already adopted occurs, then for me "take my money and save another life". I think if someone becomes upset or angry, they ought to reevaluate why they donated to begin with. Now that statement might rub a few people the wrong way, but I think we rejoice for Teri Lynn's happy ending and choose another child for the money to go to. If she had already been committed to a family, then the money, in my mind, stays with the family. However, since Teri Lynn was not committed to a family, I think reallocating to a child of the donors choice is a great option. Save another life! Ya know?
I ditto everything said by Stephanie and Elissa. I don't see how anyone could be upset that their money is helping A child regardless. When its an FSP where a family has chosen a child and something happens along the way- Most donations are made by personal family and friends who are supporting the PARENTS regardless of who they bring home. Other donations come in from fundraisers and giveaways which again would be made regardless of the name of the child. I was thrilled to know Teri Lynn was adopted- seems like a win-win: she helped spread awareness AND money will be used to help yet another child in need of being rescued.
I haven't read the link you posted yet, just your blog. My issue isn't so much that they are adopting another child, my issue is with the institution that is posting pictures of children that are not available for adoption and raising money for said children. I would think the institution would need to really be careful about putting pictures up and getting families hopes raised on children who aren't really available. Does that make sense?
I agree 100% in helping families raise the money needed for adoptions, but it really makes me leary to think of institutions putting pictures up and asking for donations if the children aren't really up for adoption. It makes me think the institution is practicing shady business.
But that doesn't mean I don't think the family should NOT be able to reallocate the funding! In my opinion, if the family fell in love with the picture, helped raise the money for said child, and then came to realize they couldn't adopt that child...then they have every right to the funds raised to go towards another adoption.
A family's story is what touches me. If ultimately they adopt a different child than who they orginally committed to, I would feel it was all part of God's plan. I'm sure this type of decision would not be an wasy one to make. My donation is still helping save a life.
I follow Adeye’s blog and have donated before when she’s advocated. I think my answer will answer all of your questions: the reason I donate is to help rescue a child, any child whether is going to be transfer to an institution or not. I would not feel mad or hurt if the family chooses to adopt a different child than the one they originally committed to. I will feel happy to know there is one less orphan in the world! Also, I’m not an expert but I think the whole overseas adoption process is sooooo difficult and tricky that things can happen and lead to changes.
If I donate money toward an adoption, I would not be upset at all about my money being used for adoption - regardless of how a family's circumstances might change. I completely understand (and have experienced) the uncertainty of international adoption, and I would be thrilled to have my money used to bring a child - any child - home to their forever family.
I must admit that I do have some concerns about advocating for specific children when the information we have about them is somewhat sketchy. I understand the emotional draw of one child's story (i.e. a child who has DS facing imminent transfer to an institution), but I feel that we should focus more on opening hearts to the greater need represented by that child (many, many children who have special needs and face a very scary future if they are not adopted).
My heart has certainly been tugged by pictures/stories of specific children; however, it makes me sad to hear stories about people who feel so in love with one child (who eventually turned out not to be available for one reason or another) that they lost their ability to see the MANY children who need mommies and daddies.
I know this is a tricky area and there are valid pros and cons for advocating/not advocating. My heart is to see every child who needs a family come home.
I am one of the people that donated, and it doesn't bother me one bit that it's going to go to another child. I wish I could give to ALL of them, so if it's not Teri Lynn because she is already adopted (so happy about this BTW), then it can go to another little sweetheart. I think what happened with Adeye's blog is a blessing despite the confusion because it raised awareness of how quickly children can decline once they are moved out of their orphanage, and it also proved that people can dig deep to show love for the orphan, even in a struggling economy.
I've supported a few adoptions where the families ended up bring home a different child (for a variety of reasons) and was never upset by this. Situations change.
I donate to Teri Lyn and was SO happy to find out she is being adopted. I have NO doubt that RR will put my $ to good use. I honestly cannot think of a better place to donate.
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